It doesn't seem fair that you're under so much pressure. Of course your friends want to live with you, but it seems at such a high price - literally and figuratively! It must be awfully expensive rent if you couldn't afford it by doing a more 'normal' job, and that seems somewhat unsustainable to me. Do you currently live with family?

Being an exotic dancer is absolutely fine if you are happy with it, but if it's making you miserable and affecting your self-esteem to this extent then I have a tough time advising someone to stick with it. It's not like a more mundane job where someone is saying they are finding their office job stressful etc. It runs a lot deeper than that.

I do think living with friends would probably be a really positive experience, but at what cost?

Have you been looking around for other jobs? I imagine you have; I do remember you saying a while back that you felt you could cope with the exotic dancer job but more standard jobs were very hard on you in terms of emetophobia/anxiety. How do you feel about that sort of thing now?

You are a very attractive and intelligent young lady and it is upsetting to think you're losing self-confidence and stuck in a job making you feel so awful. You deserve better. I really sort of feel you should quit but I don't want to sway you in any way and I can really understand you not wanting to let your friends down. But surely there would be other houses they could find, and perhaps it would be better for them to be in a more affordable one. The rule of thumb in the UK is that rent should not exceed 40% of your income otherwise you will struggle. Guidelines may be different in the US due to utilities, council tax (local rates) and food likely being quite a bit cheaper though. xxx