Finally gave in - need some support

[Lori35inRI]

NOT what you might think.

I finally gave in and threw down $80 buying 24 bottles of Germstar Noro. Yes... 24 FREAKIN' BOTTLES! i just received the shipment today so I haven't tried it yet. But... I don't understand how I have gotten SO bad that I had to do this to feel more at ease. I know it's because of the season, but I could really use some encouragement. This phobia has really taken over lately. I know I am taking every precaution, but still... How do I accept that what will be, will be and if it happens, there is not much I can do about it, but know I have to deal with it and I will be fine again soon. *sigh*

Also, my husband came home from the gym last night and made himself a steak. It was a thick cut and when he went to eat it, it was still red inside. I told him there was no way he should eat that. He said he didn't have the patience to cook it longer. Well, I told him I didn't have the patience when he gets food poisoning. He then proceeded to throw said steak in the trash and not speak to me for a few hours.

[loop-star]

Was it a beef steak? Beef can ACTUALLY be eaten raw believe it or not (although personally I don't like the texture)...I eat my steak medium so its still pink on the inside - but warm straight through....

[Lori35inRI]

Have you tried therapy or meds. Sounds like you are not happy where you are at right now. The germstar has not taken away your anxiety. I do not want to push meds. I am taking prozac and it has helped taken my anxiety down some notches. I have done therapy in the past that has helped.

Give your hubby a hug. Sounds like a bad night. I am sure he loves you, but is frustrated.

Hugs

Thanks. I am on Remeron now. The only thing it has really helped me with is being able to sleep through the night. When I'm awake, I'm pretty anxious all the time. Summer was not bad, but Winter is very difficult (which I am sure it is for all of us).

Hubby is fine! He was aggravated with me for a few hours but got over it. He is one of those that thinks nothing of v* and going about his business so this phobia is hard for him to understand.