So disgusting. *somewhat graphic*

[alexikiss]

I posted here once a couple of months ago but other than that, I hadn't felt the need to really participate here as much as I used to. Fortunately, there was no need. However, now it feels like I'm being tested and vomit is following me around.

Lately every time I am in my bathroom, I've been hearing one of the upstairs neighbors seemingly gag herself and vomit. The first time I heard it, I thought she was just coughing. But after this repeatedly happened over a couple of weeks, I've come to the conclusion that she must be bulimic because it seems induced. I found out there is a high school girl living up there, so I assume it is her. There are quite a few people living upstairs so it never fails that I hear someone peeing almost every time I am in there. However, now I have developed anxiety every night I go in there that I might hear her walk in and start doing this. I have taken to running my ceiling heater to distract from any noise. The whole situation is really gross and annoying and my socially awkward roommate actually wants to say something to the girl's mother!

In what may be unrelated (yet even more disgusting) - I was about to leave tonight to run an errand and as soon as I opened the front security gate, I smelled in the breeze what seemed like sour garbage. I had just dumped my garbage down the chute (which sometimes smells pretty vile) and so I thought maybe I had gotten a whiff of that. When I returned home, I was opening the gate and when I happened to look around, I noticed that someone had vomited over off to the corner. It wasn't anywhere near me but I froze. I was in shock. It hit me that this was what I had smelled when I was walking out the first time. Surprisingly, I felt calm and numb. I came inside and I was going to tell my roommate, but she had already gone to bed. She is a bit of an emetophobe herself.

Now the more that I think about it, the more grossed out I feel. I made sure to wash my hands and although I haven't been obsessing about noro at all lately for once, now I wonder. One of my biggest fears is actually stepping in vomit or even someone else stepping in vomit. I would rather walk barefoot over broken glass and hypodermic needles. Vomit just terrifies me in that aspect. Still, I don't know how I didn't have a panic attack just before. Maybe because it took me by surprise?

Anyway, I am sure the apartment manager will hose it down tomorrow and I think it is supposed to rain anyway. I just don't want to have to see it again and I wouldn't be surprised if I came up with a reason not to go out tomorrow if I don't have to, lol. Has anyone else experienced anything like this or have anything they'd like to share?

[Grace47]

Warning graphic***

Yes, my sister is bulimic. It's a complicated issue. Your roommate may have a point talking to the girl's parents about it. However, she should not think she'll make any friends doing that. I've told. I've kept silent. There is really no way to win in this situation. In my case, the person I told on had bleeding ulcers and was near death, but refused to get help. I saved her dang life and she hated me for it. My case was also a little different as the person was v*ing blood. Telling was the only option for me since it involved a serious health issue. My own sister has never quit this behavior and she's in her mid fourties. I was talking to a relative whose mother still does it and that woman is 89!

You know that she is not sick physically. She has a serious mental illness. She is not contagious. Her parents may be aware and feeling helpless to do anything or she may already be in some type of treatment. Regardless, she's not actually physically ill. You can't catch this. I know it smells bad and it sounds gross, but just keep the tv or the radio on. After living with a bulimic family member for many years, sometimes when you can't do anything, you just have to ignore it as hard as that may be. Scarily enough, she'll soon be able to do it silently and no one will have any idea what she's up to.

[alexikiss]

Thanks for your input on the first situation. Personally, I don't really care what someone I don't know chooses to do with their life. I have my own issues. I do not know these neighbors and have never even seen them. My roommate is constantly complaining about how noisy they are, and they are quite noisy...yet the apartment manager is too passive to tell them to be a bit more respectful. They are overcrowding their apartment past what is likely the legal number of occupants. Me hearing her vomit was kind of just the icing on the cake, the "WHAT ELSE??" Being an emetophobe, it's like a nightmare for me.

I have no reason to believe that the vomit outside the building had anything to do with her, however. What she does in her own apartment is her own business and thankfully it is not something contagious, yes. But having to SEE it and smell it really set me off tonight and I kind of spiralled out of control after posting here. I kept googling things about noro and I had no idea there was a new strain. I was blissfully unaware. Then I was washing my hands and cleaning everything...I eventually had to take Klonopin because I do have an anxiety disorder in conjunction with this phobia. It just sucks because I had gone quite a while without really obsessing over emetophobic thoughts (I was too busy with "normal" problems). I go out of my way to avoid places where people might be ill and unfortunately it has come to attack me in my own home now, lol. It's ironic because people with fears or anxiety usually see their home as their "safe zone" but with this crap going on, it is anything but. To think there are people who wouldn't give any of this a second thought. I wish I was one of them. :/

[Grace47]

That's a very good attitude. Even when you are a family member, there is often nothing you can do if the person does not sincerely want to change. In my situation, I was living with the person in a military barracks. As a military member, I had a responsibility to report a dangerous health situation. Your roommate is not in this position.

I doubt she v*ed outside your apartment. Bulimics are adept at hiding what they do. It was probably just some drunk. Still gross though. I'm sorry your living situation is difficult thanks to your neighbors. I have certainly been there and keeping to yourself is a good idea. Sounds like you need a good headset.

[ewilkins]

One question also...is it possible the girl has an illness? Maybe she's on chemo or something. Dunno. Just thought I'd throw that out there. I wouldn't have been happy to find the v outside either and I would've called the manager and definitely had them hose it. Sorry you had to go through that.

[alexikiss]

Grace - ironically, my roommate has her own mental issues that I had to call her out on. She is slowly turning into "crazy cat lady/cat hoarder" and I've been hearing "just one more cat" like an alcoholic says "just one more drink." A person will get help when THEY want to get help. Being confrontational will not solve anything, as I found out...but I didn't really care - I pay half the rent and I expect sanitary living conditions among common areas. I'm not here to be her therapist, I'm here to draw the line, haha. While I love animals, I don't want to live in a menagerie.

There are many people who live in this complex and it could have been any of them. I only brought her situation up because it was the first vomit-related issue in my life lately (having gone without them in so long). The apt manager just came over with the handyman to fix something in my bathroom and I couldn't bring myself to mention the vomit outside the gate. I can't bring myself to talk about it, even in my Klonopin-induced inhibition.

ewilkins - The first time I heard the noise coming from their apartment, I thought she was just coughing or having a hairball. It didn't sound like normal vomiting. My roommate told me she is a very pretty girl who is on the school volleyball team. While I don't know anything about them, I have a feeling word would have somehow gotten out if she had a serious illness. Then the more I thought about it, I realized that it sounded like she was making herself gag. She goes in the bathroom after everyone else is finished and I never hear any talking like, "Are you ok?" These are how paper thin the walls are. Unfortunately, I spend a lot of time in my bathroom because that's where I do my makeup and my cell phone only gets reception in there. Annnnd I kind of like to just relax on the toilet sometimes with a book, a la Al Bundy. (So picture me running off once I heard the gagging! Running to get my iPod! lololololllllllll.)

I try to find the humor in this, but honestly, this did drive me crazy all night to the point where I kept googling norovirus and just thinking, "I do not want to live like this. This is not healthy!" Ironically, norovirus is a few days of horrible suffering and this is a lifetime of horrible suffering.

To make matters worse, now I am paranoid about my own bathroom activity. I don't think they can hear me peeing but I did think about what if I ever had to be sick. Being sick would be horrible on its own, but having to worry about everyone hearing you? Not to mention I'd probably be crying and acting like a damn fool. How embarrassing!

Ugh, I really hope the manager did something about the vomit outside the building. He usually hoses things down for no reason; the plants, etc. It looks damp and wet outside a bit, and so I hope it magically disappeared. I've lived here almost a year and this is the first time something creepy or disgusting has occurred. Fortunately, there is another exit through the private garage that I can leave from and not have to walk past that area. I think I was just in shock when I saw it. When I first smelled it, I didn't even recognize the odor - that's how long it has been since I've encountered...that.

I apologize to anyone who I've offended by using graphic words rather than just "v." While I understand why those words upset people, I feel like I would be doing myself a disservice because those words don't bother me and I wouldn't want to sensitize myself to them.

[Grace47]

Look up the city ordinance on pets. My town has a limit of four cats/dogs before the law will get involved. You may have to tell her that the complex has a limit on the number of pets a person can have and you don't want to be evicted over it. She obviously has issues about connecting to other people if she's a hoarder. She seriously needs counseling for her OCD. You are right, you can't be her therapist.

I have lived in apartments like this. I ended up turning on the water whenever I was going.

BTW, I didn't confront the person either. I told my supervisor (proper chain of command) who told the chaplin who told the medic who drug her behind in for counseling and medical evaluation.