It's so interesting learning about what aspect of the whole experience effects you all. I am scared of v at night time and not making it to a receptacle but I am absolutely parylized with fear when someone says they feel sicky.. I don.t understand why, but the last 3 times one of the children have been sick, a feeling of "phew, now s/he got it, s/he won't get it again, it is relief I think. It kind of feels like I'm expecting a visitor I'm scared of and hearing the knock on the door and thinking, "well at least I don't need to worry for for a while. Now only three kids to go". It's so stupid because I see now that I 'expect' them to get sick. Hope that makes sense!