Do any of you do this?

[surfer777]

Hey everyone, been a few weeks since I posted. I've been trying to recover from the last episode I had, being back home is helping a lot.

Here's a little back story for you guys. As my name suggests, I love surfing. So this evening, I went down to a spot I surf pretty regularly, but with the summer in full swing, there were a lot of little kids around. So right before I paddled out, I looked over and saw a kid, maybe 8 or 10 years old, throwing up in the sand. He took a swig of water, rinsed his mouth, and ran back into the ocean.

So with that backstory, we can get to the issue at hand. I let my mind get out of control. I keep thinking that he got ocean water in his mouth and spit it out and that his vomit particles got into the ocean and made their way into my mouth. The therapists I've seen tell me I have OCD, I guess this is the OCD in me, so maybe the question is how many of you have OCD associated with your emetophobia?

(I'm sure the kid sucked down too much salt water and just spewed on the beach, but it still sparks obsessive/compulsive and VERY intrusive thoughts).

What do you guys have to say? When someone throws up, do you go through a similar thought process? How do you avoid spiraling out of control?

[HannahO]

I often wonder how they can just be okay right after. I want to know the secret to Ving and being able to handle it without losing my mind. So I guess the answer to your question is, yes. I pick apart everything. I would have also thought he infected the ocean.

[mdgirl1977]

I'm sure it was water so maybe he was spitting it up. likewise I would have been worried about the water and probably moved a bit away. but in reality, you are fine and you know that.

off topic, I lived in San Diego for a while about a decade ago and never forgave myself for not learning to surf. I am totally jealous!!!

[surfer777]

I pretty much live for surfing...everything is fine as long as I can surf. So when my phobia and surfing collide, it's really a bizarre feeling.

I know the kid probably wasn't contagious or anything, I know if you drink too much saltwater it will make you barf, but it's all the unknowns that drive my OCD I think. My rational thoughts just can't overpower the irrational thoughts. For instance...any small amount of vomit that may have gotten into the ocean is minimal compared to the amount of water in the vicinity. We also paddled out about 50 yards away from where this kid was. We ended up drifting back to where this kid initially was, but the chances of ingested enough particles to make me sick if he was contagious is slim to none. But I still can't shake the irrational thoughts.

I guess it's fairly "normal" for those of us with this phobia to think this way then?

[Collie]

Totally normal (for us emets) to think that way, but realistically if he was sick with a virus he wouldn't get right back up. No kid is that resilient! Still gross though, sorry you had to see that

Reminds me of when I was in Hawaii just happily bobbing along in the ocean and some dude swimming in the distance starts vomiting violently INTO THE OCEAN. He was far enough away that I couldn't see it but I could definitely hear it. So gross. I think he was really drunk though but it still scared the crap outta me

[rebecca1976]

Totally normal thoughts for an emet with OCD, i have totally ludicrous thoughts sometimes, a kid was vomiting 2 cars down from mine in a supermarket car park, I freaked because I thought the particles would get in my car through the air conditioning system, I even did the 48 hour countdown, that is beyond irrational.

[surfer777]

So after you do the countdown (I generally do 72 hours, just to be safe), are you pretty much back to normal? I find that once the potential incubation period is over, I'm almost back to normal because I know I didn't catch anything. I'll be on edge for the next couple of days because in the back (and at times, front) of my mind, I'll be worried about catching something from this kid.

[anna81]

I would freak out about the water too! Whenever I see or hear that someone has been v'ing I instantly worry that my kids or me will get it even if we haven't been in contact with them! I instantly think 'oh my god i feel sick' straight away! I used to be able to relax within a few days but I have been totally on edge and can't seem to shake the fear since my daughter had a really sicky phase a few months ago. And there is still a v bug going around the school now!! Aargh!

[Charzy14]

I am just as bad... and I am even a therapist! Obviously I don't treat phobias, but I do treat most everything else.

I am the same way...countdown and all. I worry up until the 72 hours is over, then I am pretty much fine. I worry about my car windows being open while I am driving after it has rained because I fear that someone could have v'd in the street or in the gutter and then the v* particles would fly in. That is just one of the odd things I think of; I think up some extremely creative/crazy stuff! I think most of us emets do!

[NicManri]

Totally have OCD! And I swear it's made my emet worse! I've been emet all my life but it never had any effect on my life until two years ago when I suddenly developed bad OCD.

[rebecca1976]

So after you do the countdown (I generally do 72 hours, just to be safe), are you pretty much back to normal? I find that once the potential incubation period is over, I'm almost back to normal because I know I didn't catch anything. I'll be on edge for the next couple of days because in the back (and at times, front) of my mind, I'll be worried about catching something from this kid.

I only do a 48 hour countdown, in my experience sv hit within 30-40 hours after exposure, I can obsess over it during this time so I keep really busy to occupy my brain and it helps a lot. If there is somebody in your life that you really trust it helps to tell them your irrational thoughts, not only getting it off your chest will make you feel better but they can unravel your irrational thinking by talking logically and calm you down so you can see sense.

[surfer777]

Well it's bittersweet I'm not alone with the OCD...I'm really sorry you all have to deal with it too though! I've really been trying lately to embrace rational thoughts and let them take over the irrational thoughts, but it's hard!

Quick update, I haven't thrown up yet, probably won't...the longer I've been away from the kid throwing up, the more I can embrace the rational thinking. Plus I got stitches last night (ran into a fence, haha!) which definitely redirected my thoughts!

One thing I've thought about recently is how many times I've had an "episode" when someone has been sick. I can say with certainty that every time I've freaked out about getting a stomach virus or about throwing up at all, it has done me NO good because I haven't thrown up since I was maybe 7 or 8 (I'm 24 now). You would think that would prompt me to not freak out, but I think subconsciously I've associated the freaking out with actually protecting me from viruses or from whatever would cause me to throw up. Clearly that's a problem because freaking out can't protect us (though it may help us wash our hands more which does protect us...)

So the question is...how do you rewire the brain so that you don't associate freaking out with being a helpful behavior??

[NicManri]

Well it's bittersweet I'm not alone with the OCD...I'm really sorry you all have to deal with it too though! I've really been trying lately to embrace rational thoughts and let them take over the irrational thoughts, but it's hard!

Quick update, I haven't thrown up yet, probably won't...the longer I've been away from the kid throwing up, the more I can embrace the rational thinking. Plus I got stitches last night (ran into a fence, haha!) which definitely redirected my thoughts!

One thing I've thought about recently is how many times I've had an "episode" when someone has been sick. I can say with certainty that every time I've freaked out about getting a stomach virus or about throwing up at all, it has done me NO good because I haven't thrown up since I was maybe 7 or 8 (I'm 24 now). You would think that would prompt me to not freak out, but I think subconsciously I've associated the freaking out with actually protecting me from viruses or from whatever would cause me to throw up. Clearly that's a problem because freaking out can't protect us (though it may help us wash our hands more which does protect us...)

So the question is...how do you rewire the brain so that you don't associate freaking out with being a helpful behavior??

I've v* but not from a SV since I was 7 or 8 also, I'm 26 now. My problem is that I haven't had an SV in that long so I've all of sudden have the thought that my luck must be running out or that it's "my turn" to catch one

[mdgirl1977]

I feel the same way, Nic. my luck...I don't know if I ever had he sv...just a few episodes of v a few times. about 10 years ago I had d and v over a few hours that was bad bad so maybe it was Noro. I was in bed for 2 days. but it's been like 9/10 years ... so I also worry about time

[surfer777]

I do the same thing...I start thinking my number is up and the virus is coming for me. I always start thinking about the statistics and how eventually, I'll HAVE to be one of the 6% each year that gets nailed.

But how irrational are these thoughts?? If people make sure to not do something stupid and maintain a healthy lifestyle, the facts say they don't get sick as often. So it's really not impossible for us to not get noro because we wash our hands frequently and are very aware of our surroundings (granted, the anxiety might be worse than actually getting sick). I guess we don't have to worry about becoming that 6% because we're so conscious of everything going on. But to me, that's where my problem lies...all of the worrying and anxiety coming from these intrusive thoughts about my number getting called, or thinking randomly that tonight is the night I'll get sick.

It's really hard for me to choose between trying to mentally get better from this phobia and OCD and sticking with staying very aware of sickness and washing my hands a lot, because I know washing my hands keeps me from getting sick. But the OCD and the phobia wear me out and I'm getting tired of always being afraid...I'm sure several of you have this same struggle...what do you guys do about it??

[NicManri]

I do the same thing...I start thinking my number is up and the virus is coming for me. I always start thinking about the statistics and how eventually, I'll HAVE to be one of the 6% each year that gets nailed.

But how irrational are these thoughts?? If people make sure to not do something stupid and maintain a healthy lifestyle, the facts say they don't get sick as often. So it's really not impossible for us to not get noro because we wash our hands frequently and are very aware of our surroundings (granted, the anxiety might be worse than actually getting sick). I guess we don't have to worry about becoming that 6% because we're so conscious of everything going on. But to me, that's where my problem lies...all of the worrying and anxiety coming from these intrusive thoughts about my number getting called, or thinking randomly that tonight is the night I'll get sick.

It's really hard for me to choose between trying to mentally get better from this phobia and OCD and sticking with staying very aware of sickness and washing my hands a lot, because I know washing my hands keeps me from getting sick. But the OCD and the phobia wear me out and I'm getting tired of always being afraid...I'm sure several of you have this same struggle...what do you guys do about it??

I know what you mean. I would eventually like to try hypnotherapy but at the sametime I don't want it to make me ease up on my hygiene. It's a struggle, I really think my OCD caused my emet to be out of control. I never used to have thoughts about my time being up or if I HAVE to wash my hands before touching my food or ill be sick...I literally cannot touch anything before touching my food. It is exhausting and it wears me out and I know my thoughts are irrational but in a moment of panic or when my OCD sets in I can't seem to think as clearly, or those thoughts override my rational ones

[kitbuddy]

I am SO glad that I'm not the only one to do this sort of stuff! I always scrub my hands before eating or touching food- even opening bottles of water. I've thrown out bottles of water that were almost full because I thought my purse or my elbow touched the part that I drink out of. I'll also use a fork for things that should be eaten by hand, like french fries or tacos.

My OCD is situational. I can be totally fine for days, weeks even...and then something v* or sickness-related happens and all hell breaks loose. One time, it was walking past a roped off area near a bathroom airport (it was DEFINITELY cleaned-up v*), another time it was a co-worker complaining about her kids having sv*. I obsessed about possible exposure for days after.

I think the craziest thing was back in March. I was stuck in traffic and I rolled my window down about halfway for some fresh air. As I went under an overpass, some strange-colored liquid splattered down onto my window, door and my hands and FACE. It was probably old rainwater, but I convinced myself that it could have been v*. I literally did not eat a single thing for the next 2 days.