Big families and Emetophobia.

[Maddie-_-]

This is the thing weighing on my mind. Our family is really big. In our actual house its only me my mum and my sister but we have so much extended family its crazy. My mum has this idea that we all have to be really really close and all that. Its fine, but I wish there werent so many damn kids. Basically, I have 4 cousins under the age of 10.
Then 3 that are 13 14 and 15. Then there is my sister who is almost 16. Then there are my aunts and uncles. One of my aunts is gross, and I mean gross. She has no shame in burping, farting or coughing all over you. And she still comes over if shes ill, she just doesnt care and sure doesnt understand my emet.

One of my uncles is severly mentally ill. Then there is my grandma, who is the best person ever, but she said something that killed me the other day..'we are just waiting for the old maddy to come back'

My grandma and grandpa on my mums side are in Israel, and my grandpa seems determined not to live lol. Just today he got rushed to hospital for trying to kick a football in the park and he fell over almost cracking his head open...And if a bomb siren goes off, he walks so slowly he cant get to the bomb shelter so he sits on the toilet. Im not kidding..

Then theres my crazy non-related family. These guys are like my real family, I call her auntie and stuff because shes my mums best friend since secondary school.
She has 11 kids. Yes I am serious. 3 new born triplets, 2 girl age 13 and 9 and then god knows the rest, but they dont live with her, but they do very often all come over.

They seem to have it in for me! Always ill, its so stressful. I dont know what posting about it could do, I just needed a good old rant haha.

Plus, my mum is disabled and as she ages, she requires me to do more work, which im fine with, but im actually really worried about how bad she is getting. She has to shout and she doesnt remember things, her backs always bothering her (she broke a disk in it when i was 5) and her arms are getting harder for her to move (her arms are disfigured from birth)
So yes that was long sorry! thanks for reading, though.

[mhartse]

As much as its scary to have a lot of people that close to you, it can be nice, because you have that many people to rely on! Challenges will come and people grow old, but your family is important!

[Mamafear]

Hey gorgeous girl, that's a lot of stress for a teen! I completely understand the stress around having lots of people around, especially little kids and people with a poor relationship with hygiene. See if you can come up with a plan for each time you feel exposed, like if someone feels ill while at your place you wait until they go and just do a quick wipe around. Have a wee emergency kit with things like anti Noro wipes, peppermints (or whatever you like), a favourite comfort object and a magazine or two that you don't read until you need distracting, anti emetic, Tums (or your chosen treatment for indigestion) and anything else you think might help. That gave me a feeling of control and it means you can grab everything you need in one bag. Does Mum get help for her condition?

[NicManri]

I agree with the kit idea. I don't like having people in my house, especially during flu season. Thankfully I don't have to worry about many people coming over in the winter but my bf does work in a gym and I cringe at the thought of all the germs he comes in contact with. Anyway I have a kit of stuff in case one of us does get sick. Bleach wipes, bleach, gloves, face mask, anti-emetics and I always make sure to have ginger ale, crckers and at least a can of chicken soup on hand.

[Maddie-_-]

Wow thanks! I never thought of having a kit, but tomorrow im setting off to get everything I need! That idea has made me feel so much more relaxed! Thanks guys

[Maddie-_-]

Oh, and not really. Shes a campaigner and loves it, she gets up on a train 4 days of the week up to London, walks around, she doesnt want to stop. She does get kaneisiology (not sure how to spell it) and massages, but it doesnt help all the other stuff.

[mdgirl1977]

11 kids! my god, that makes my uterus actually hurt! that is...insane.

ok, so they don't "have it in for you", doll. they are living life. around you, yes. I like the idea of having a kit. my bathroom has all that stuff (except the mask) and it is a good idea to be prepared and no one needs to know. just stash it in a drawer in your room or something. easy. obviously, because you are a minor, I would run having meds past your mom. otherwise, nothing is prescription, so go for it and stock up.

kids are germy. adults can be too, that is life. we are clean, though, and that is the first line of defense.

omg the relative who strolls during sirens and sits on the toilet in Israel comment made me laugh so hard, btw. I have relatives like that. I just picture a sloth with music in the background going "dooohhh dohhhh dohhhhhhh"

[Maddie-_-]

Hahaha mdgirl he is so cute, he is so fat we actually had to get him specialist pants. That must be great, being that old that you know you are off soon so you just eat the world of food. Thats the way im living out my last days for sure!
And yeah, i wish they wouldnt live their lives! i know thats the bad thing, you cant just stop someone having fun, so ill just get my 'kit' and suck it up! if thats even possible. lol.

although my therapist did say, because we are off on holiday soon, that sometimes the memory is worth the fear. so im keeping that in mind

[ren2005]

Ha! I remember those days...and now they are gone.
I have 3 older brothers and they all have kids...but way before I ever got married and had my own child.

Back when I lived at home with my parents.... I remember family gatherings very well. Anxiety time.
I remember when my brothers and their wives would come with ALL the kids for Thanksgiving, Christmas..etc.
I was always so worried if I heard one was sick the night before, etc. I hated every second of it wondering if they would bring it into my house or get sick at our house.

I look back on that and survived. All the kids are now in their late teens to mid twenties now.
Now we are always invited over to their houses and I take my son! Then I worry about of course, if anyone in the house was sick a few days before. LOL Worry never ends in that dept.

I am crazy... But, I love my family...and glad I saw them grow from being babies to be amazing adults. Just gotta tell yourself that these times don't last forever. As hard as it is...they don't. That poor woman with 11 kids??? YIKES!!!!!!!!!

Time passes by super fast. One day..it will all be over and every one will have their own life.
I am now married with my own 3 year old....he is who I worry about now! But again, he is only a child for such a short time. I try to cherish every moment.