"Do one thing every day that scares you" - Eleanor Roosevelt.
Recently, I've been thinking of that quote a lot. I watched an incredible documentary (type "Extreme OCD camp" into youtube and watch both parts) about handling OCD using exposure therapy, and watching the incredible results for such a severe mental illness as OCD has given me hope with my emetophobia-related anxiety. After some research, one will discover that emetophobia is actually an anxiety disorder, and anxiety is very closely related to OCD since anxiety is what stems the obsessive compulsive behaviour.
It doesn't have to be big steps, guys.
I want to stress that. The more you face in terms of your emetophobia, the easier it will be to handle. As the documentary says, there's only so much you can do in a therapist's office. There's only so much that Cognitive Behavioural Therapy can do because it doesn't put you in real life situations.
The only one who can truly help you is yourself.
For example, (although it's small), I used to never eat after 8pm because I'd previously had many severe nocturnal panic attacks after eating too late and going to bed full (then panicking that I was going to v****). I had decided that if I just refrained from eating after 8 and got used to sleeping on an empty stomach, I would always have that comfort. The "you're-not-going-to-v****-because-there's-nothing-in-your-stomach-so-it's-impossible" comfort. And it got me to sleep for a few months, but after a while I realised that pandering to the anxiety is letting it win; that it was doing more harm than good and that if I ever had to eat after 8pm (e.g. took a late flight or something) I would always panic more.
My advice: Don't let it take over your life.
Slowly but surely I began to eat later and later, ignoring my brain as it screamed "NO DON'T DO THAT, YOU'LL PANIC WHEN YOU GO TO BED TONIGHT!" because panicking a few hours later is less significant than taking steps towards dealing with the problem as a whole NOW.
Having a panic attack is not the end of the world, and it's actually better to do something that scares you and have a panic attack than to not do it at all.
Because I repeatedly forced myself to eat after 8pm and told myself it would be fine, I eventually realised it would be fine and WILL be fine. Because going to bed with a full stomach doesn't make you v****, that's silly. Now I can eat after 8pm and assure myself that I will be fine. I can eat after 8pm without panicking. It's a very small thing, but I believe that making small changes is great, because the more small changes you make, the more big things in your life will be positively impacted.
Even if you're anxious or having a panic attack, plugging through it and allowing the feelings to happen can help in the long run, it creates a sense of pride.
EXAMPLE: I was away from home with my family last week(My family make me very anxious), staying in a house I was uncomfortable with and not used to, with new people and new experiences. It was daunting, and I was on the verge of a panic attack, incredibly anxious, ready to click on the "book ticket" button so I could get the train home and escape from being out of my comfort zone. It took some persuasion from a close family member, but it made me realise; what good does it do to run away? If I face my anxieties, I can think back and know I faced them. Would you rather look back and think, "I'm glad I did that even though I panicked" or would you rather look back and think "I'm disappointed that I ran away when I could have stuck it out"? I know the instinct is fight or flight, but you don't HAVE to fly as soon as something gets daunting, in fact, I'd like to dissuade you from doing so.
You are stronger than you think.
YOU CAN DO THIS. You, reading this message right now, can do this. Don't be afraid.
Much love people, and good luck. I hope this is enough to inspire you to take baby steps to move forward.
(please comment below if this has inspired you to change anything, I'd love to hear it!)
Carpe diem.
- Ophi xx