Really proud of myself!
Warning... I might ramble on a bit here lol!
So... I moved in with my boyfriend 6 months ago, and about a month into being there with him, after some drinking one night I was having my usual panic as I do and my bf was drunk and admitted to me he had been v-ing almost nightly in the bathroom... But it's normal for him as he used to have a crazy lifestyle so now if he eats/drinks certain things it just happens to him (kind of like ibs but with v). Even though I knew for years he's one of these people that 'like' to v if he feels the tiniest bit queasy I didn't know the extent of it as he kept it hidden coz of my phobia!
Anyway, this really freaked me out even though I knew I couldn't catch it! I was shakey everytime he went to the bathroom incase it was happening behind the wall from me. I eventually got more and more confident about it and even heard him V one morning, I was scared but I didn't run away or cry or shake (as much as I wanted to) I just tried to get back to sleep and when he came back to bed I even cuddled into him!! (Major breakthrough for me I would usually be half way down the street lol!)
In October I had to return back to my mums as I had some appointments and my little sisters birthday, the night before I was due to fly home I was in the bathroom and heard my bf say 'oh' to himself (in a worried tone) I didn't really think anything of it but as I came out the bathroom he looked really weird, just unlike himself! I sat down and said 'are you oka.....' And he promptly V'd right in front of me all over the room!!!! He then ran to the bathroom where I heard him R more, freshened up and then came out totally apologetic and feeling terrible it had happened in front of me!
USUALLY, I would have cried and shook and promptly left the house to stay elsewhere (considering I saw it happen and everything in the room was covered in it just inches from me)! I would have also not got on the plane the following day incase I 'came down with it' on the plane and was stuck for 4 and a half hours on my own with it! Anyway, that night I was kinda shaky and worried but my first words weren't 'omg I have to get out of here' they were 'OMG are you ok???!!!' I was worried about him and not myself!!! He convinced me it was his 'normal' again and he knew it was gonna happen but since I was in the bathroom he was trying to hold it back and then just couldn't (and he did feel really awful about me seeing)! He cleaned up the room (not to the standards I would have liked but hey ho), he was fine afterwards, eating and drinking as normal. I even shared the bed with him that night, cuddled into him, kissed him etc and got on my flight the next day!
We're both living back in the uk now and I've had no more experiences of hearing/seeing it but I am just so proud of myself for that one time! Aside from the night I had a SV a V'd myself 2 years ago, it was the bravest I have ever been in my life around V!! (It's a shame I can't be so brave when it comes to my anxiety!) lol
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Even though it doesn't sound like much fun to have a boyfriend who Vs so easily (for him or you), it seems like it's helping you with your anxiety, which is huge!
