The Pill

[Koizumiii]

Hello everyone! I've been away for a long time, and luckily, I'm not back because of horrible news... exactly...

I get horrible cramping with my period, and it doesn't respond to pain meds. The first 2-3 days are curl-up-in-bed-and-cry level pain. I've missed school, and it's generally awful. My mom took me to see the gynecologist recently and she told me a few things I could try to make it better (pain meds, diet changes, hot pad, exercise, etc), and when I told her I already did all that, she told me what I already kind of knew: the pill was my last option. I explained to her that my mother is extremely anti birth control, and that it was unlikely that she would allow me to begin taking it. The doctor gave me a prescription I could take to a planned parenthood or CVS near me and get them without my parents needing to know, but the nearest planned parenthood is an hour each way by metro... and when using metro, as anyone in the DC area knows, you need to plan in a LOT of extra time. I don't think I could make that trip each month, nor can I afford it. Each treatment would be 50 from CVS (a 20 minute walk) or 20+ from planned parenthood... or free with insurance.

The reason I'm posting here today is to ask if anyone has any advice for me. I've got next to no money, and traveling would be really hard with the time amount and everything involved. I'm also only 15 so I can't get a job.

My mother is against it because she believes it will cause me to be barren, even once I stop taking it in the future. My dad, who I expected to be more rational and scientific, went off on a rant about how he doesn't think BC pills actually stop the body from having children, it just disconnects the mind from the body and "if the mind isn't in sync with the body, of course you can't get pregnant!" To top it all off, he then had the nerve to say that he gets the SAME TYPE OF PAIN after he runs and that he just takes pain meds and it gets better... except he's a guy and if I knew that there was an action I was doing that caused this pain (that causes me to be paralyzed in bed, crying, for 2-3 days) I wouldn't keep doing it! Plus, pain meds don't work for me anyway.
Does anyone know how I could convince my parents to allow me to take it?

p.s. This is not a major contender for why I want to take it, but my boyfriend and I recently lost our virginities to each other and even through we always use condoms, I would love an extra fail safe.

[Malalcala]

Hmmmm wow. Ok...

I'm gonna respond as a med student here if that's ok.
First and foremost what BC does is essentially deliver a high enough level of progesterone/estrogen (most are combo these days because they have less side effects and are safer long term) to persuade your body not to ovulate. Which is essentially what would happen in the very early stages of pregnancy and why you don't menstruate or continue to develop follicles during a pregnancy.
It does NOT disconnect the mind from the body.. rather it does almost the opposite.. those hormones from the BC sorta talk to your pituitary gland & hypothalamus and are like "hey!! Hold off on developing that next egg we have other things to do!!". So while you are on the pill your menstrual cycle is sorta in stasis due to the fact that you are getting a steady dose of hormones rather than the fluctuating levels that our bodies need to make it all the way through the cycle
Of COURSE you should be able to get pregnant someday should you choose to do so!! It may take a few months or sometimes only weeks for your body to hop right back on its normal cycle but I promise our systems are very efficient machines and simply the fact that most women take a week off the pill to "get a period" proves this... the reason that happens is that once the hormone level drops the uterus sheds that lining it had built up in prep for its next round!

To be honest I recognize that this stuff is actually pretty complicated (trust me.. a LOT of us struggle w/it while studying the details) so it's understandable that there are misconceptions and superstitions. I think if you were a patient I saw w/my attendings in clinic I might try to figure out if we could meet w/you and your parents together and see if we could talk through some of this and hopefully dispel some of the fear and anxiety your parents have. It's possible that they think putting you on BC would encourage you to have sex if they aren't aware that you have already made that decision. So that these fears may be more about you growing up than the actual med.
On that note I would encourage you to talk to them if possible & of course continue to be smart & safe ( condoms are always gonna be the ONLY way to prevent STDs so even if you are able to procure BC think carefully before quitting condoms all together.. and of course don't forget that bugs & viruses can also be transmitted orally).

I don't have any solutions for you re: money and insurance maybe someone else will have thoughts there.. I guess I would just try to keep up a dialogue w/your parents if at all possible.

Re: the pain, there is actually a physiologic reason why menstrual pain is different.. when we shed the lining of the uterus the blood vessels that were building up to support a possible baby die causing something called "ischemic pain". This is why NSAIDs are helpful but also why sometimes w/extreme pain practitioners encourage women to simply continue their BC and not take that week off.. so the uterine lining doesn't shed. I am not a fan of comparing pain like "mine is worse than yours" because we never know what the other person really feels but it definitely is a unique pain.

Anyway, I am definitely not trying to give you medical advice here.. but hopefully maybe some information you can share and work with?
And if all else fails keep in mind that a LOT of young women experience more pain early on and it is possible that your cycle will become less intense as the years go on (I know this was true for me & the text books seem to agree that it isn't uncommon).
I wish you luck!!
~M

[Afdpt]

Would your doctor be willing to talk to them with you, maybe hearing it from a medical professional will help them realize that it's a safe thing to do and will significantly improve your pain each month. Or even printing off some research yourself to help supplement what you're telling them.

If you can't convince them of that and the trip to get the birth control each month is just too much you should be able to get several months supply at once. My doctor always had mine written for 3 months at a time and you may even be able to have more than that (6 months or more even) if you talked to the DR about the circumstance.