Hi Everybody, I really hope this helps someone.

Up until April 4 of last year when I woke up one morning and realized that WOW I was no longer living in fear of vomit!, I was so extremely emetophobic for 15 years (maybe longer) that I could not even join a support community like this because if someone wrote a word I didn't like or shared an experience that scared me I would get triggered and my fear would be made worse than it already was, and that was something I simply could not handle. I couldn't fight my fears and all of yours too - no offense. So I isolated myself and read a lot.

Four random books that have nothing to do with emetophobia are what taught me how to stop being terrified of vomiting and how to stop living each day terrorizing myself. The best way I can describe my emetophobic life in one sentence: I lived through many horrible stomach viruses that never actually happened. And I had IBS too - really bad.

Within one week of changing my diet the diarrhea and all my other IBS digestive issues went away and haven't come back. It's amazing how quickly eating whole real food can heal a gut. Getting rid of IBS helped a lot because every time I had a dreaded *D* attack I would panic that it would lead to the even more dreaded *V* attack. That's what I used to call it. No more IBS meant no more chronic nausea, no more scary abdominal cramps and pains and noises, and no more running to the bathroom ... not having IBS attacks meant I didn't fear vomiting as often either. It's not an overstatement to say half my emetophobia was automatically gone once my IBS was gone.

The four random books that have nothing to do with emetophobia that ended up being the recovery answer to my emetophobia problem are:

1. Scream. Chilling Adventures in the Science of Fear.
By Margee Kerr - Sociologist / Fear Expert
The cover glows in the dark and has a "do not be afraid" warning sticker lol which is kinda cool.

2. The Daniel Plan Jumpstart Guide (small booklet). Healthier Steps to a Healthier Life.
By Rick Warren, Daniel Amen MD, Mark Hyman MD
The 5 essential steps are: Faith, Food, Fitness, Focus, Friends.

3. Internal Affairs. Emotional Stability in an Unstable World.
by Dr. Larry Hutton

4. The Forks Over Knives Plan. A 4-Week Meal-By-Meal Makeover. How to Transition to the Life-Saving, Whole-Food, Plant-Based Diet.
By Alona Pulde, M.D., and Matthew Lederman M.D.

Obviously I did not just read these books, I actually did what they said to do and how they said to do it. Also obviously, this is what worked for me but I have no way of knowing if it will work for you and I have no professional qualifications to recommend anything for anyone's mental or physical health. The only reason I'm posting this is because I know how defeated, hopeless and alone I felt when nothing seemed to work. I did the whole therapy and medication thing and each time I got my hopes up that *this* therapy or *that* medication was going to rid me of this phobia, I was always crushed when nothing ever really changed in any significant or sustainable way. The message I want to impart to you is this: Do not let anybody tell you that there is no cure for this phobia and do not believe that others might recover but you can't overcome it. You absolutely can - you just have to find what works for you, and your recovery might come in the most seemingly unlikely random way, just like mine did. So don't give up! Keep searching, keep trying different things, but don't waste your time on what you know isn't working for you. Use your time, energy, and money to find what WILL work for you. You're not doomed, this phobia is not a life sentence if you don't want it to be - you just have to find what works for you and of course you have to WANT to recover, and I understand not everybody does and that's okay too if that's your choice. But I thought I'd post my recovery story in hopes that maybe one other person can be inspired to find her or his own unique way out of emetophobia especially if the standard CBT/Exposure + Medication route isn't working for you or you can't afford it. You're not doomed - there is something out there for you that will work and that you can afford - you just have to find it and not give up until you do.