I can't even eat...

[vfark81]

I have panic disorder that is triggered by v*. I've been having attacks for almost 20 years. I was doing really well with this for a couple years. Now my panic attacks are more frequent than ever. I'm getting to a point where I'm afraid to cook, I'm afraid to have someone cook for me, and I'm even afraid to eat. I don't eat full meals anymore and I'm losing a lot of weight. I need to be able to eat... anyone else experience this??

[thecheesecake17]

YES! Went out for a meal with parents today..long story short, ended up crying in the ladies room due to not wanting to eat as we are far from home and I didn't wanna get sick ... I cried because of my stupid mind, I'm also losing pounds each week.

I think it is definitely mind over matter though because the second we got home I opened some chocolate and ate it just fine.... Do these feelings come in phases with you? Mine certainly do, some weeks I BINGE, not concerningly but enough to feel junkie...

Try eating small bits of your favourite food - pizza is my weakness but I can't even stomach that these days :/ also, crackers seem to settle extremely well from what I've seen and heard...
I hope you feel better soon

[vfark81]

Yes to all of that!! I had to get up from my mom's birthday dinner twice because of the same thing. Then I had a panic attack the whole car ride home.

It definitely is a phase for me. Some days, I don't care at all and I eat whatever I want like I'm invincible. Other days, I can barely get through a cup of coffee.

It's mind over matter but mind is winning this round. It's so hard to explain it to other people around me, which makes my anxiety even worse. I always get "IT'S FINE, JUST EAT IT." I can't. What if it's not cooked right. What if it sat out for too long. What if it makes me not feel good. I have a series of questions I have to talk myself through before I can eat. It's so frustrating at this point. I can't eat meals, I have to eat small snacks. The amount of weight I'm losing is scary.. I've tried to eat more organic stuff and less meat and that is easing my mind a bit. But I still am having a hard time with meals..

[Theshadow]

Seems like I have been going through that myself lately, and it doesn’t help that I deal with constipation as well, which can make you feel really sick all the time.

[thecheesecake17]

Theshadow, I've had that on and off for over a week and realising that it could be why I've been extra stomach sensitive all week... ! You're right, it apparently is a cause of n*

Vfark you're so right, peoples responses are so futile, if only they knew the plates we are spinning inside our heads. You do sound like you're suffering pretty bad with the weight loss thing but it's good how you're eating healthier.. I find the healthies a lot less tolerable tbh especially cos foods with rich fibre make our digestive system go a little haywire.
Have woken up strangely hungry (unusual) and know it's gonna be one of those days :/