Hi Ansjo, and welcome! I don't come on here often but when I do I try to reply to some threads, especially new people. I'm 32 and have had this fear since I was 5, so I can relate. Mine got much worse at the age of 20. I think this phobia in general has a tendency to wax and wane, and can become much worse in adulthood.

The first recommendation I have for you is to consider medication for the anxiety if you are open to that, by first speaking to a doctor. You are describing panic attacks and generalized anxiety, and there are long-term medications that can really help. I'm not talking about tranquilizers, more like SSRI's which work only after taking them for a period of time. I can't tell you how much this helped me when I finally decided to bring up my debilitating anxiety to my doctor (I didn't even tell them about the phobia at first, just the anxiety and depression). I started taking Celexa 20 mg once per day and it really took the edge off, it was a life-saver.

Secondly, you should research any therapists in your area who have experience with treating this phobia. This is not easy to find, as many therapists have not treated it, OR more likely just don't publicize it. If you find any that look promising, I would call and ask them if they actually have heard of or treating this phobia specifically.

Thirdly, I would take a peak at emetophobiahelp.org, which is a website created by a former emetophobic who was successfully recovered after years of suffering and therapy, and is now a therapist herself. She has lots of advice and resources on her website (including a comprehensive around the globe therapists list) that might help you.

I hope you start to feeling better soon. Time is often the best remedy but sometimes you just need some outside help to break the cycle.