If you really care about him than good-for-you for trying to make it work. The first year of my relationship with my husband was long distance. It sucked. We did the whole "we're not bf/gf" thing, so we couldn't get mad at each other for any infidelities. Now, we were quite young at the time 22-23yrs old. He was ALWAYS honest with me and I ALWAYS had the opportunity to leave. You are not married and not even engaged - so he really has no reason to lie to you. I would seriously question why he didn't tell you. I would make it very clear that honesty is a must - even if it hurts. If you find yourself always worrying and fretting about what he is doing, then you may be doing the wrong thing. What broke up his first marriage? Infidelity? What do you want from this relationship? THese are things you two need to talk about.