I'd choose death over v*ing too. :/

OCD and phobias are both anxiety-based disorders, so it's not that
uncommon for them to occur together. I've had OCD since I was young,
though it got worse as I developed emet. I have all sorts of weird
little rituals (most involve counting) and a fear of contamination.

In some ways, I'm lucky to have a sister who also has OCD and a
phobia-- we can easily relate. She's one of the few people who doesn't
poke fun at me when I panic over an unexpected v* scene on television,
and she warns me about imminent graphic content. I have ample time to
run screaming into the night if I so wish.



Have you ever thought about getting psychiatric help? Having a
therapist to rant at has helped me a lot-- I can completely lose my
composure in front of her (I hate showing emotion in the first place)
and it's okay because I know she isn't judging me.

It's sad and unfair when someone so young has to suffer through so much
emotional garbage. If there's anywhere you can get help, go for it--
the sooner you nip this, the better.

Good luck. :}