I’m a HORIBBLE mom -

[gemini72]

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My (2.5 year old) daughter woke up last night at 10PM and v* EVERYTHING in her bed. I could not believe the amount that came from that child. She was COVERED.


I screamed for my husband and he took her into the bathroom, and took care of her and put her in a bath while I was on clean-up patrol. If Elizabeth didn't have her beloved Elmo comforter and sheets, I would have thrown them out. I didn't know what to do with myself.


I washed EVERYTHING and sprayed my bleach/water solution all around her bedroom and bathroom.


She vomited every half hour - then every hour. It's amazing how your body will puke to the minute of an hour!


In all - she v* 6 times, and every time she woke up retching, I had to wake up my husband to go in her room and care for her while I watched on like some horrified school girl.


She is fine today - loves the pedi-pops. Is over-joyed that she gets as much gingerale as she wants.


She hasn't v* since 1:30am. No fever - no d*. As I write this she is playing playdough with her father. What would I do without him.


I, on the other hand, am an emotional wreck. I had to take a tranquilizer last night just to bear with it all.


I feel like a failure. Hell - I am a failure. I can't even take care of my baby girl when she is sick. I am in tears now, and I don't know what to do.


Nichole


PS - I will NEVER make Sloppy Joes again.

[donna1216]

I am so sorry--you have no idea how many times I've woken up to those sights and sounds. I truly am glad that she is feeling better today!! How awful last night, though!! Keep us posted on her progress!!

[mommy2braylynn]

((((HUGS)))))) You are SO not a bad mommy, I would be the same way!! My daughter is 14 months, and thank the Lord, she hasn't puked too much REAL food yet, but I know when the day comes, I will be the same way, making my husband do it all! Please don't feel bad, she knows you love her and will one day understand!

[new.slang]

You are a GREAT mommy! I can't beleive you would say otherwise. You stayed in the house, you cleaned the bed(which is amazing) and you are with her today. You should be very proud! [img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img]

[andee]

Please don't say you are horrible. I am the same way and felt the same guilt----but one of my therapists says that is why there are 2 parents. Your hubby helped out and you didn't neglect her. And she won't remember this. I did the same thing to my daughter at 18 months old. She got sick in the living room and I jumped over the gate and left her there to call my husband and parents! She was crying....I finally got a towel to wrap her in and we waited outside for someone to rescue me. Then I fell apart!!! Don't worry, she will be fine, and so will you!!!</font>

[shiva]

This does not make you a bad person or a bad mother. Please give yourself more credit.

[jandub]

OH you did just fine! And if you were a single mom then you would have had to deal with her alone , but like Andee said, that is why there are two parents. I am 32 and I married a man ten years older than me, and so we have a grandson. When he visits, my hubby WILL NOT change his diapers if he poops. Even if he is in the same room when I change him, he will gag and v*. He cannot handle it, so I just know when diapers need a changin, its gonna be me and me alone. Same with v*. He just has to help me when it happens with my kids, that's just how it is. And it works. Sounds like you and your hubby have a system, and it works too! Janna

[subaruprincess]

Don't be so hard on yourself. You're not a bad mother! My children have been through much worse with me, and the older 2 are doing just fine emotionally. Neither one of them thinks that I am a bad mother, they know that I am terrified of v*, and manage to get by when they're sick.


If you think about it, many fathers will act in almost the same manner when they havea young child with a drity diaper, and it's never alarming to anyone. My dad used to rip off my diaper and hold me up to the shower, even when I was only a few weeks old. He had to watch my daughter when she was 2 when I was in the hospital. He actually drove her up to my mother's office to have her change her dirty diaper. My husband has been known to do the same thing when it comes to diapers, yet no one thinks he's a bad father because of it.


I DID throw my 3 year old daughter's favorite bedding away last month when she was sick, and by the sound of it, she wasn't as sick as your daugher. I also threw away all of my new towels, which weren't cheap.


Trust me, if your husband for some reason couldn't care for her, you would find a way. I've had to do it before. I can't get a doctor to prescribe anything to help with the panic and anxiety, so it isn't easy. But I've made it through. It was never easy for me, and minutes seemed like days, but I survived. A terrible mother is someone who makes a choice to cause harm to their child, either emotionally or physically. You didn't choose to have this phobia.


I'm sure that if we all were to make a list of the strange things our children have had to endure, or things they haven't been able to do because of our fear, you'd see that you're doing just fine. My kids have never been to any public body of water, rarely attend a birthday party, and only have immediate family at their own parties because of my phobia. Sometimes I'll even get a hunch that I shouldn't take them to school, just because I'm afraid they'll catch something. I've resulted to asking them to sleep in the bathroom, with appropriate bedding of course, to avoid contaminating anything or anyone when they're sick. I've avoided well child check ups, and put of getting them to a doctor when they've needed one because I'm terrified of them catching something in the doctor's office.


You're doing just fine. You love your daughter. That is what matters. Don't be so hard on yourself. I hope she gets better, and I hope you feel better.





Katie

[kellybean]

You are NOT a bad mother!! I will be doing the same thing when I am in that situation. Except, I don't know if I will be able to clean it up!!!

[gemini72]

Thank you girls[img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img]


I just felt so out of control with her sickness. I have never been with someone who had the sv, so this was all new to me.


Of course, now you can imagine that I am paranoid that I will catch it - or my husband will catch it. He isn't as careful as I am with germ avoidance.


She is sleeping on the couch now - with her paci (yes, she gets her paci during the day if she's sick) and her Taggie. What more can a child need?


Thanks again girls, your support is much appreciated. Now, I'm gonna try to catch some zzz's.


Nichole[img]smileys/smilies_46.gif[/img]

[xexxhoshi]

Ok so like, I'm a bit late to this (and I'm like, probably the only guy in this thread) but you aren't a bad mother, trust me. Sometimes there's some things that one parent can't handle that the other parent has to take care of, it's standard family fair, and everyone pulling together for each other. For one I'm the one who has to get all the creepy-crawlies out of the house, the women in the family can't stand them. &gt;_&gt;

Anyway, you've got a healthy happy young daughter, that alone is evidence that you're a good mother, no? [img]smileys/smilies_04.gif[/img]

[silver]

You are not a bad mother, you did a wonderful job and did the best that you could. I can relate to the guilt that you feel...I posted earlier in the week about how I had been avoiding my nefew because he had been sick. I felt so guilty and so selfish...everyone on this site really helped me with it, but the guilt is still here. I think that the worst thing that we can do is make ourselves feel even worse about it. You did the best that you could, you were there, you cleaned it up, be proud of that!!

[gemini72]

OMG!


I just realized that I spelled "Horrible" incorrectly. [img]smileys/smilies_09.gif[/img]


Wow! I must have been sleep deprived!


Sorry about that! Thanks for all your support! She's in bed now - didn't eat much at all, and drank a bit of juice for dinner. Tomorrow she'll wake up starved I'm sure!


Nichole

[6pksummer]

Im so sorry that you are going through this. I do know how you feel. All of us do! You are not a bad mom either. Sounds like you did pretty good cleaning it up. I do agree that it is amazing that they v* every15-30-60 mins on the dot!! It is also incredible how much...breaks my heart.