I really don't know what to do!

[emily-jane]

I'm 18 and living at home with my Mum with no income. I've tried on a couple of occasions to get a job but I've only lasted a couple of days at both because of panic attacks and my fear of being in public while v* (I always think it's going to happen when I'm in public). I feel so guilty that I can't help bring in money and pay for my own things especially as I'm considered an adult now. I really don't know what to do and I'm sick of people (including my Dad and his girlfriend) saying that I'm just lazy and can't be bothered because they don't understand... I've noticed that a lot of people on here are happily in work and that makes me feel even more guilty because if other people with this phobia can do it, so can I!

I'm sorry about this, I just really needed to rant!

[lauren37]

Hi Emily I understand how you feel my parents think i can just get over it too! and u are not the only one who cant work i would never be able to work i am in high school but i barely get to school if that makes u feel any better maybe try explaining to your dad or having him read something about this condition so he can understand more i hope this helped and u will be doing better soon

[Lorni]

Hello, I'm 17 so only abit younger, I got my first job at 16.. When my Emet was terrible! I worked in a all-purpose large store called The Range. Over winter aswell so goodness lnows how many times I come into contact with the nasties. I once had a customer who come to my till looking like she was about to V*.. with a small basket of stuff. She looked very pale and ill, she hurried me along to 'check' her bottle of pepsi, so I did. She was huffing and puffing, faning herself with her hand, and eventually started to lean on my till space. As you can imagen I was just going out of my mind, I couldn't stop paniking! She didned V* she darted out of she shop weither she was ill later idk. But since then I created me sick station. In a sense I am quite comfortable with telling people about me emet its a big part of my life and I'm not embarressed by it. I told a guy who I worked with at the time, he thought it was weird but hey, it is weird to non emets. I asked him if anyone was ever sick, he said no but if they were just give them a bucket from under the till. And from that day I created my 'sick station' lol. I had a bucket with a range bag inside, paper towels and some cleaning bleach.. All under my till. Perhaps when you find a new job for your own comfort make a sick station.. I highly doubt it will ever come in useful, mine never did. But if it makes you feel better and at ease, to the point where your happy to work. They there you go, your sorted. Finding little ways around these problems and your on your way, I wish you lots of luck finding a job! You can do it!

[emily-jane]

Hello, I'm 17 so only abit younger, I got my first job at 16.. When my Emet was terrible! I worked in a all-purpose large store called The Range. Over winter aswell so goodness lnows how many times I come into contact with the nasties. I once had a customer who come to my till looking like she was about to V*.. with a small basket of stuff. She looked very pale and ill, she hurried me along to 'check' her bottle of pepsi, so I did. She was huffing and puffing, faning herself with her hand, and eventually started to lean on my till space. As you can imagen I was just going out of my mind, I couldn't stop paniking! She didned V* she darted out of she shop weither she was ill later idk. But since then I created me sick station. In a sense I am quite comfortable with telling people about me emet its a big part of my life and I'm not embarressed by it. I told a guy who I worked with at the time, he thought it was weird but hey, it is weird to non emets. I asked him if anyone was ever sick, he said no but if they were just give them a bucket from under the till. And from that day I created my 'sick station' lol. I had a bucket with a range bag inside, paper towels and some cleaning bleach.. All under my till. Perhaps when you find a new job for your own comfort make a sick station.. I highly doubt it will ever come in useful, mine never did. But if it makes you feel better and at ease, to the point where your happy to work. They there you go, your sorted. Finding little ways around these problems and your on your way, I wish you lots of luck finding a job! You can do it!

That situation with the ill woman must have been terrible! I don't know how you coped haha. Thanks so much for this message though, the sick station is such a good idea, I'd never thought of that before, my sick station is always the toilet, I have to know where the toilets are everywhere I go!

[cinque]

Try not to feel too guilty! 18 is still very young and this isn't your fault. You can work through it. What would you like to be in an ideal world? Have you seen a doctor about your anxiety and panic attacks? You don't have to face it all on your own And you should be entitled to jobseekers' allowance or incapacity benefit/income support? I am in a pretty similar situation but it's IBS that is stopping me getting proper work. I am so frustrated by it. I am hoping to beat it by the end of this year. xxx

[emily-jane]

Try not to feel too guilty! 18 is still very young and this isn't your fault. You can work through it. What would you like to be in an ideal world? Have you seen a doctor about your anxiety and panic attacks? You don't have to face it all on your own And you should be entitled to jobseekers' allowance or incapacity benefit/income support? I am in a pretty similar situation but it's IBS that is stopping me getting proper work. I am so frustrated by it. I am hoping to beat it by the end of this year. xxx

In an ideal world I would love to be an archaeologist (I know, that sounds kind of nerdy and no-one I know in real life believes me when I tell them!) but due to not going to school, not getting any grades at GCSE and my emet I can't go on to do A-levels then on to Uni... Yeah I have seen my doctor, I was sent to a counsellor but after 2 sessions she decided that CBT would be more effective in my case and my first appt. is on the 11th! I was thinking about applying for jobseekers but that would in turn mean I'd end up with a job and at the moment I'm really not ready for that as my emet is quite bad. I was thinking of asking my GP about how to go about getting incapacity benefit, but I thought maybe I wouldn't be elligible for it... I hope your IBS gets better and you manage to beat it! xoxo

[cinque]

That sounds like a great ambition! you could probably do a sort of access course and then go on to University; not everyone goes through the conventional route. Learndirect might be able to help: (call 0800 101 901 from 7am to 11pm). As for the incapacity benefit thing, I definitely think your condition is valid, but I don't know if they've sort of frozen new applications for now (which is ridiculous; people need an income if they're not able to work). But you should definitely ask. Thank you for the encouragement xxx

[Mrs.Wise]

What about working from home? There are call center jobs you can do from home if you have a computer and landline. You even get to make your own schedule!